The TV Journal

Dear Diary,

I had no plans to watch Stargate: Universe. That is, until I read about the internet crapstorm the show has sparked. Producers are arguing with newspaper columnists. Stars are quitting their twitter accounts. I admit it. My curiosity was piqued. I found that, while the show is not all bad, it’s still a lot not good. And I came up with some ideas that I think could really help.

1. Cut the cord! This one is critical. Why do we care that these people are stranded far from home if we’re watching them visit home to schtup the wife or go clubbing? For the Destiny to fend for itself. Meanwhile, show us what life is like for those left behind.
2. Actions have consequences. At least they should. We all know the air scrubbers are going to be fixed, the ship will not blow up, and Lt. Scott will not be swallowed by a crevasse. How about putting these characters in some real danger?
3. Break the mold. The show is rife with stereotypes. From the Angry Black Man (who is actually in jail when we meet him) to the misanthropic genius, this cast of characters needs some serious updating.
4. The brain is the largest sex organ, or so the saying goes. We need to see the people who are being intimate with each other connect in some other context for their relationships to have an impact on the audience. Otherwise they just seem like a bunch of randy monkeys.
5. Have we met? Who are all those people who went racing through the stargate before the explosion? Why were they at Icarus? Are they civilians? What are their talents? What are their fears? If we’re supposed to care about them, we need to know their stories.
6. I say a little prayer for you? A military officer once hair’s breadth from becoming a priest is an interesting choice. It would be great to see how his spirituality comes into play in his current circumstances.
7. Look, a shiny new toy. Kinos, spacesuits and levitating sleighs seem to be very conveniently located in the habitable areas of the ship. That’s really just too convenient.
8. What seems to be the problem? The ship can dial some gates but not Earth. The navigation doesn’t work but the weapons do. Whatever is wrong with the ship needs to be consistent week-to-week. Not the same, just consistent.
9. Don’t jump the gun. Isn’t seven episodes in just a little too soon to mount a rescue mission? I mean, if the mission works, you kind of don’t have a show anymore. Let’s leave the passengers on the Destiny alone for a little while and see how they do.

Too bad no one on the show is ever going to read my very personal and private journal. Oh well.

Still a fan,
C.C.

Posted in Uncategorized brian j. smith, stargate universe, syfy

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